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Archive for the ‘humor’ Category

Humor Friday

Action speaks louder than words, but not nearly as often.

— Mark Twain (Public Domain)

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Humor Friday

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

— George Burns (photo by NBC/Elmer Holloway; Public Domain)

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Humor Friday

It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.

— Mark Twain (1907; by A.F. Bradley, Public Domain)

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Humor Friday

I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.

— Oscar Wilde (1889, by Napoleon Sarony; Public Domain)

My instinct is that Wilde didn’t suffer fools gladly, and probably had certain journalists in mind when he said this.

—Mike Hazell

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Humor Friday

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.

— Phyllis Diller (Public Domain)

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Having imagination, it takes you an hour to write a paragraph that if you were unimaginative would take you only a minute.

— Franklin Pierce Adams (Public Domain)

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The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.

— Abraham Lincoln (1863, by Alexander Gardner; Public Domain)

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Humor Friday

This is the sixth book I’ve written, which isn’t bad for a guy who’s only read two.

— George Burns (by NBC/Elmer Holloway; Public Domain)

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Humor (Sort of) Friday

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.

— Groucho Marx (Public Domain)

Spring is typically one of my favorite times of the year. After February, the shortest month that often seems like the longest, a general sense of renewal begins to take hold in those wonderful months of March through May. I read this quote from Groucho Marx, and my first thought was to replace the word “evening” with “springtime.” After all, this has been anything but a typical spring.

We never know what’s in store for us, or how our lives might be disrupted by outside forces, so we must play the hand we are dealt at any given time. Robert Louis Stevenson said, “Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but of playing a poor hand well.” To that end, we may not be able to control the circumstances surrounding us, but we sure as heck can control how we perceive them. We might as well fully embrace where we are at this moment in time and make the most of it!

—Mike Hazell

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Humor Friday

There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about. 

— Oscar Wilde (1889, by Napoleon Sarony; Public Domain)

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