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Archive for the ‘humor’ Category

Groucho Friday

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.

Marx, Groucho

—Groucho Marx

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Humor Friday

In Beverly Hills…they don’t throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

Allen Woody in Annie Hall

—Woody Allen

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Humor Friday

War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.

Bierce, Ambrose

—Ambrose Bierce

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Friday Humor

I’d like to live like a poor man—only with lots of money.

Picasso, Pablo

—Pablo Picasso

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Banks

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.

frost_robert

—Robert Frost

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Humor Friday

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

diller-phyllis

—Phyllis Diller

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Classic Lincoln

During the Civil War, a temperance committee visited the president and asked him to fire General Grant.

Surprised, Lincoln asked why.

“He drinks too much,” answered the spokesman for the group.

“Well,” said Lincoln, “I wish some of you would tell me the brand of whiskey that Grant drinks, I would like to send a barrel of it to every one of my other generals.”

lincoln-abraham_by_gardner_1865-crop

 

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